This is my final exams time of MCA Semester 5. Some of the papers were quite difficult to solve and may be got failure and re-attend them in June 2012. Actually this papers are not so hard, but I had not prepared properly to attend them in this season. I am feeling stress while facing the exams without good preparations. From February onwards my last semester will begin. This time I want to be prepared for all the remaining subject which are not cleared. I want to do that and for that I have to visit the main office of IGNOU at Ahmedabad. I would talk to them and clear all the subject in June 2012, if they will allow me to do so. Because with business I can't handle the exams and studies. The other side I am thinking about Ph.D.program on any scientific subject. But first I have to complete the PG and get the degree. I want to spend my rest of life behind work and studies. Besides that there is nothing in my life. If my family will annoy me, I have to leave my home forever. But before that I have to complete my responsibilities as brother. I am deadly trying to arrange my sisters' marriages. My relatives are selfish and jealous as I have found them avoiding our matters about marriages. Some of them had made joke on us. They have told me to find out grooms from the Parsi religion. They know that this religion have never accepted our people in their. They are kind people but they are not easy with our religion. Let it leave here otherwise it will become any religious nuisance.
I am feeling any problem is there with our family. I am thinking this because we are finding grooms for my sisters since last 14 years and still not got appropriate proposal for them. In February 2011, I had nodded my head positively for my marriage. But from March ending to till day I have found that I will never get married with anybody as I have lost my self in the love with the lady "Madness". She is quite different and me too. Our thoughts, diets, languages, life style all are different from each other. But I love her the most in this universe. She had the problem that she doesn't know me properly. She had called me unknown. So I have written all my school life, college life, general life etc. I have written stories to show her my hobby of writing. I have published my own and home's photos too. I have requested that lady to come on FB, the lady who have cursed me and my Love ("Madness") in past and I had done pledge to talk never with her. She had published her photos and thoughts about our relation of rude friendship. It was just to show my love that I am pious and my love is pure for her. She has gone from each of my contact. I am not sad for that as I had removed her from my life before step into the year 2011. These are the last few days of this memorable year 2011. This year I will never forget, because I have met the most beautiful lady "Madness". I had become mesmerized in that moment. Still I feel the same feelings while closed my eyes. My love for her will never end.
I am not trying to force her to come back in my life. But all lovers wish their love should come in their life. I think I am not making any crime to wish the same. I am really very nervous and unsure about my future. I am feeling unsecured about my love life. What will happened with me? What will I get from rest of my life? this kind of questions are hammering in my head. What will happened if you are suffering from this kind of feelings and your final exams are running. The time is not giving the satisfaction to my life.In all this nuisance I am fearing to become rebel from the society. But the next moment of this thought, I pray to God for making me calm and give stamina to tolerate this bad time.
This is her choice to love me or not, but I love her by bottom of my heart and I will do it till my death. Love has become my religion and she has become my God. while all this moments, I feel happy seeing her beautiful eyes and innocent smile. My Empress looks so beautiful while smiling. My papers were not going well as I was not watching her face before go for exams, but when I have started to go to exams after watching her my papers are going very well. Maybe I am superstitious, but this is true.
I want to ask her ..........am I still ..........doubtful to you........ am I still .........unknown....still feeling ....I am stranger.........???
I am feeling any problem is there with our family. I am thinking this because we are finding grooms for my sisters since last 14 years and still not got appropriate proposal for them. In February 2011, I had nodded my head positively for my marriage. But from March ending to till day I have found that I will never get married with anybody as I have lost my self in the love with the lady "Madness". She is quite different and me too. Our thoughts, diets, languages, life style all are different from each other. But I love her the most in this universe. She had the problem that she doesn't know me properly. She had called me unknown. So I have written all my school life, college life, general life etc. I have written stories to show her my hobby of writing. I have published my own and home's photos too. I have requested that lady to come on FB, the lady who have cursed me and my Love ("Madness") in past and I had done pledge to talk never with her. She had published her photos and thoughts about our relation of rude friendship. It was just to show my love that I am pious and my love is pure for her. She has gone from each of my contact. I am not sad for that as I had removed her from my life before step into the year 2011. These are the last few days of this memorable year 2011. This year I will never forget, because I have met the most beautiful lady "Madness". I had become mesmerized in that moment. Still I feel the same feelings while closed my eyes. My love for her will never end.
I am not trying to force her to come back in my life. But all lovers wish their love should come in their life. I think I am not making any crime to wish the same. I am really very nervous and unsure about my future. I am feeling unsecured about my love life. What will happened with me? What will I get from rest of my life? this kind of questions are hammering in my head. What will happened if you are suffering from this kind of feelings and your final exams are running. The time is not giving the satisfaction to my life.In all this nuisance I am fearing to become rebel from the society. But the next moment of this thought, I pray to God for making me calm and give stamina to tolerate this bad time.
This is her choice to love me or not, but I love her by bottom of my heart and I will do it till my death. Love has become my religion and she has become my God. while all this moments, I feel happy seeing her beautiful eyes and innocent smile. My Empress looks so beautiful while smiling. My papers were not going well as I was not watching her face before go for exams, but when I have started to go to exams after watching her my papers are going very well. Maybe I am superstitious, but this is true.
I want to ask her ..........am I still ..........doubtful to you........ am I still .........unknown....still feeling ....I am stranger.........???
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